Stop Holding on to These People

Sometimes pruning our lives is the way God prepares us for more fruit. For instance, if you don’t prune the branches off of vines, they will take the sap from branches, preventing fruit from ever being produced. Similarly, in our lives, there are people who when kept at a close distance, will cause you to be delayed, distracted, and can sabotage your calling and your purpose.

Those people typically fall within one of these eight categories. If they are in your life, it’s time to let them go.

8 People You Need to Let Go of Today

1. The Betrayer

The first one may be obvious. This is the person who betrays your trust and loyalty for their gain. This type of person may pretend to be close but will work against you when the opportunity is right. When we see the Bible, we see that the most prominent and well-known example is Judas. He betrayed Jesus for 30 pieces of silver. In fact Psalms 41:9, says, “Even my close friend, someone I trusted, one who shared my bread, has turned against me.”

2. The Toxic Companion

Secondly is the Jonah type of people. Now, these are the people who bring storms into your life because they’re running from God’s will in their life. We see this in the Bible when the sailors with Jonah faced a crazy storm because Jonah had gotten into their boat. They actually had to let Jonah go by throwing him overboard. In the same way, sometimes peace will come into your life only when you choose to let go of people who bring chaos (1 Corinthians 15:33).

3. The Distractor

Next is the Delilah type. Now, it’s important to understand that these types of people can entice and distract you from your purpose, often using manipulation and seduction. In the Bible this was seen when Delilah caused Samson to lose his strength and connection with God as a result of the relationship. In other words, holding onto people like this can lead you into spiritual trouble. The Bible tells us in Proverbs 13:20 that “A companion of fools suffers harm.”

4. The Doubter

The fourth category of people is what I call “the 10 spies.” These are the people who discourage you from stepping into God’s promises because they focus on fear and obstacles. When we look back at the story of Joshua, we see that the 10 spies discouraged Israel from entering the promised land out of fear and doubt in God’s word. It was this behavior that caused Israel to wander in the wilderness and not live out what God originally desired for them (Numbers 13-14).

5. The User

Next, we see that there is the category of people that are the prodigal-friends. This friend type is describes as those who are only around when they can gain something from you, but they leave you when times get tough.

It’s interesting in the story of the Prodigal son, that when a he runs out of money, so do all his friends. This let’s us know that they were only ever with him because of what he had and provided them with. Similarly, you may have friends in your life that are only there because they’re getting something out of you and the moment you come under attack, they wash their hands and they quickly disappear.

Begin to notice in your life if there are people with behaviors like this surrounding you. If so, it’s time to cut them off.

6. The Oppressor

Sixth is the Pharaoh type. Pharaoh was known in the Bible to be the one who did not allow the people of God to leave the land of Egypt and flourish until God intervened. Similarly, this category of people refuse to let you grow. In one way or another they may be keeping you bound in unhealthy cycles and relationships for their benefit. If there are people in your life who keep you bound in one way or another, stand on God’s word in Galatians 5:1 which says, “It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by the yoke of slavery.”

7. The Envious One

Another common type of people in relationships is the Saul-type of friend. These are people who don’t celebrate your success, but instead, they try to sabotage or compete with you out of jealousy. In Scripture, a clear example of this was King Saul. He envied David and as a result, he repeatedly tried to kill him because of the success and favor on his life. Don’t fall into this trap.

8. The Limiter

Lastly, it’s important to notice those in our lives who are limiters. These are people who may not be necessarily bad, but their presence holds you back from stepping into the fullness of God’s plan in your life. In some way or another, they cause constant or unnecessary strife and limit your growth. In Genesis, we see that there was tension and strife between Abraham and Lot and God didn’t reveal the fullness of His plan to Abraham until Lot had left his side (Genesis 13:14-15). Similarly, you may need to take action and remove certain people in your life who are not adding but taking. before the Lord fullyOnce Lot left, God revealed the full extent of His promise to Abraham.

What to Do During This Season of Pruning

• Let them go – don’t hold them back
  If somebody’s leaving your life, I would encourage you to let them. Don’t chase them. Don’t be desperate. Don’t give them promises and don’t try to hold on to someone who does not want to stay.

• Don’t hold grudges
  It’s okay to grieve, but we must not develop offense. Even if the person was toxic, the history and the good times you shared will bring some pain when they leave. However, if you keep rejection, bitterness, and unforgiveness in your heart, you might contaminate what God’s going to bring into your life.

• Stay hopeful
  Next, know that your future is not connected to those who left you, to those who betrayed you, to those who tried to sabotage you. Your future is connected to God.
  Some people were like scaffolding—they were there for a season and a reason, and when the wall is built, the scaffolding comes down. When people leave and your army is smaller, it’s not a time to retreat into self-pity, negativity, and defeat—it’s time to advance.

• Don’t burn the bridge
  Lastly, as mentioned above, Abraham had to let Lot go. However, Lot needed help down the road and Abraham chose to help him. We also see in the Bible that Jethro let Moses go, but he didn’t burn the bridge—he became a blessing to Moses. The father kept the light on for the prodigal son. Joseph was mistreated and rejected by his brothers, but he kept the light on—and when they came back, he saved them.
  In other words, keep the lights on. Be that bigger person and don’t burn the bridge when you don’t need to.

Read: 30 Declarations to Break the Spirit of Fear